9-24-2025 Wednesday Morning Thoughts

Good morning, et cetera, dear Reader, and welcome to this free, obscure American blog, where we are fortunately (again! haha) out of cigarettes and waiting on coffee.

Well, I failed at my doctor's office yesterday; the man gave me multiple opportunities to confess to the cigarette smoking and seek his help for it by asking "Are you sure there's nothing else?" - a few times. Even though it was more like "Hey, I already know, are you going to be honest with me?"

But, no; here comes dumbass me with pride and fear running the show.  I was just too embarrassed primarily (pride), since I'd made it nearly a decade without them before; public admissions of stupidity, it turns out, can be challenging and/or difficult; I should have prepared better mentally before going in.

Great, so now, instead of just handling it correctly the first time, like I should have and know to do, NO. I lied, and here we are. It's not like he won't find out or doesn't already know!

Now I could have just owned it and told him the fact that I'm not sure that I trust any of the smoking-cessation aids that Big Pharma has come up with to date; like Chantix ('may cause suicidal ideations' - what?!) Seems to me like just smoking is the safer option between the two, but I do see that this very statement itself is a logical fallacy. 😟 haha, I should write a book "How to kick your own ass with Logic" but I digress.

Sorry, but this mind needs zero help with overly-histrionic ideations, thank you! That's why it's a hard-pass on that (Chantix), and any other 'remedy' if that dangerous side-effect is even a remote potentiality and, given the fact that I'm already diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, doesn't that make the odds of those dangerous side-effects even more likely (for me)? Now, I've got to do something - but prescription remedies, the ones I'm aware of, those aren't going to cut it, I'm afraid. Every time I've quit these things so far in life, it's been just me putting them down and walking away from them, full stop.

I'd love to blame external forces but, like all of my other character weaknesses and failures - and there are many, it's 100% an inside job here; nobody can do this for me, I've got to be adult enough to fully own it. And now I have to apologize to my doctor for insulting his intelligence, yes, but primarily for the sin of lying to him; I despise lying, even and maybe especially from myself and am not proud of this behavior, but truth is truth so at least I can start there and take the next steps toward restoration by first admitting it. And I can only do that because I am first willing to admit it to myself. (Remember the recent Scripture about the light in you being darkness? To me, that's all about being honest with ourselves to equip and enable us to be honest with others and, as you can see, it's not a recipe for perfection - look at my own failure from yesterday as a living, current example). So, I'm still not perfect (to nobody's surprise including my own) but praise God that He's given us the instructions for how to rightly handle it when we mess up. Isn't it great to have instructions? 

Here is today's Proverb (Proverbs 24 ESV) dear Reader. And here it is in audio format as well because "Faith cometh by hearing, and hearing the Word of God"

May we each be brave enough to do right things today, may He create situations for repentance and empower us beyond our human, prideful fears as He works in and through us for the accomplishment of His will, in Jesus' Name, amen.