Tuesday, April 14th, 2026

 Good morning, et cetera, dear Reader, and welcome! We find ourselves on this side of the grave again today - and I'd say that's a fabulous start to the day! We have the gift of Life - again! We can be grateful that His mercies are new every morning. It's just about five-thirty here in this time zone; I 'slept in' (meaning that I woke up right at five-o'clock this morning). In the habit of playing whatever song I wake up thinking about, here is today's:

Crucified with Christ - Philips, Craig, & Dean

This is one of those days that I'm about to read the day's Proverb again, (here it is in audio format) as there are times that I can sense that the words just aren't 'registering' - but now, I've almost drained that first cup of coffee and the mind is starting to follow this body in 'being awake'. 

The "American" themed outfit that I ordered came in yesterday and, though my hubby quickly absconded with the hat (which, I had a feeling that he would), I'll wear the casual ensemble for the first time today. As it is, the continuous coffee is serving its job of helping me fully wake-up.

This, right here, is why we share the things that God has done for us with others, ad infinitum, because when we do so, we are in the actual process of overcoming: overcoming our own flesh, and overcoming the enemy. To intentionally recall all that He's done is a very powerful weapon in quelling our own doubts as well; not only that, but how else will they (everyone else) know how wonderful He is unless we tell them? First and foremost though is the Blood of the Lamb! There is no salvation without that first and foremost.
Then we tell the world about the miracles! (because our personal experiences with God are literally the words of our testimony)

There was the time in 2012 or so when our primary care doctor found a growth on my adopted father's prostate - but we prayed, I asked everyone with a FACE to pray for him - and by the time he got to the specialists' office, that doctor took forever when trying to get his own images and ultimately came out and told my dad "I'm sorry that it's taking so long, but, you see, there's no growth in the images that I'm taking!" (that one freaked my dad out pretty well, he spent the next whole day or two up in their master suite, apparently trying to absorb what had just happened). 
The time that the Lord gave me the $300 that I needed to cover my rent (I had 24 hours left and had quit a lucrative, executive assistant job at a Dallas ad agency to return to waiting tables as a matter of conscience) - and two great guys that I'd worked with for Gaylord came in, sat in my section, had a $25 tab - and left me three $100 bills. I called the one, crying, and told him that he'd made a terrible mistake, but he said "No, no mistake; the Holy Spirit told me to do it".

And those are just two of SO many, y'all! 
The time I woke up in the back of an ambulance after drinking too much alcohol too fast, and found a policeman and an EMT; I asked them what was going on, the policeman told me "We were about to code you" - I  didn't know what that meant so I was like "Whatever, I feel fine now, can I go?" and they let me; twenty years later, my dumbass finally learned what "code you" meant - that I showed no signs of life! But there I was, I woke up sober as a judge with no feeling or discernible trace of alcohol anywhere to be found.
Now, those are just a few times that flood back into my heart and mind when I sit and start to recount all the amazing things He's done for me, and I've never deserved a single one of those miracles, but here I sit, telling you, so that you can be encouraged in your own faith, too. 
I wake up today abundantly aware of the fact that every breath He's given me is one that I literally do NOT deserve, and yet, I live.
That's some seriously powerful stuff, if you ask me.
When counting miracles, the way He's shown Himself mighty to save and redeem, to heal and guide and inspire, I can't count the miracles because there are just way too many! Praise God! 

Count 'em - Brandon Lake

Reader, if you sit there and start to reflect on all that the Lord has done for you, your faith and gratitude will swell up and overwhelm the doubts of the enemy, lickety-split. 
Walk in grace and victory today; I love you, but MAN does He love you so, so, SO much more! 

💘

April 13th, 2026: A Monday

Good morning, et cetera, folks, and welcome to this obscure little blip in cyberspace! We just got back from catching Bella and Casper (dogs) who found a way to get out of the backyard; we plan to resolve that very soon.

Here is a link to today's Proverb if, like me, you need and are seeking for Wisdom; I read the Proverbs every day in the hopes that it will help. 

The weather here is a little strange; a month ago, we dealt with highs in the 90s F, but look at the forecast for today:

Well, leaning into the cooler weather, I have the chance to wear my favorite, comfy dark forest green tiered cotton dress and my cowboy boots, which suits this cooler weather perfectly. 

One of my female friends came by for a short chat this morning, just a little while ago; it was great to see her, she's awesome! But now, she's at work. My husband has been getting up with me in the mornings lately and though it does cut into my typical morning devotional time, I'm still appreciating the time together, and am being more flexible with regard to the hard and fast rule I've set for myself of "wake up and immediately read the day's Proverb!" Jesus went off by Himself to pray often, and I do copy His model for that and notice that there are actually several portions of every day that doing so is likely and opportune, I just have to be aware for those times to open up and take advantage of them. I encourage you to do the same. Heck, I can be pushing my cart in Walmart, praying for the people I see around me, asking God to stretch our finances and meet the needs; praying while driving is also great because the other people who see you doing it will probably just think you're on a hands-free phone call, and that suits me just fine. I say these things to say this: there is always opportunity for prayer. There may not always be periods of silence that foster the ability to hear His still, small voice, but, again, those times do occur and it's incumbent upon us to notice these chances and take advantage of them. You don't have to close your eyes, you don't have to bow your head, it's not about posturing or religion. Just let your heart talk to Him and be willing and ready to hear as well - it's a posture of the heart.

So we have lain out a plan to get Dignity House off the ground as early as next month by way of outreach, a plan the Lord dropped into my heart a couple of days ago. Which, I love how He's like "this is the way, now walk in it" and, though He's not showing me the entire journey all at once which is what I'd prefer, He's faithful and true and continues to reveal each "next step" to me in it's time, and none of the small things He's shown me so far has been like "Ok, now you need to jump right up to the top of Mt. Everest" or anything like that. No, it's the small, simple things - things that I can actually handle 😆

As I move farther away from wasting my life in online forums (because, for me, that's precisely what it was, I am not saying that it applies to everyone), the vision for the future, for God's plans through our hands, is becoming more and more real by the day. In retrospect, I feel that God dropped His plan on me, I wrote some grant requests and got our EIN, and then I instantly retreated right back into online escapism, for nearly another two years. Sometimes, y'all, I can be SO slow on the uptake! So, if you find that true for you, too, be encouraged, because He is *going* to make His will be known and be done on earth, we can trust and believe that fact up until our very last breath. We have some good examples to go by: look at Moses, he was tripping. He spent forty years in the wilderness! And Jonah, I really identify with him! He's like "Um, no, God" and immediately tried to escape on a boat going the literal opposite direction of Ninevah. 
Since I don't relish the idea time spent inside of a massive marine animal, I figured I'd better regroup and get about the Lord's business after all because, like I already said, trust and believe that He WILL see to it that His will is done here on earth. When you hear His voice in your heart... just obey. That's best. I know, we're human! But I'm just trying to encourage you, do the best you can. 
Frankly, my calling overwhelms and intimidates me. It's huge, massive, and unfamiliar territory: I have chosen to do the 'homeless' thing more than once as an adult and bring that experience to the table in service to those in that situation now (for whatever reason). 
Further, my years in the ministry as a student, graduate, and later staff member, have also all been in preparation to equip me for such a time as this. 
The part that is as of yet unfamiliar is being the founder and director of a ministry myself. I've had very powerful, well-paying jobs in leadership roles though, in the secular realm, and pray that the experience gleaned from those are also part of His holy preparation for me for what lies ahead. I've had two different bosses who each chose to call me "the Bulldog" (an attorney in Corpus Christi and a Project Manger in Dallas) for the way I perform in leadership roles and hope this steely determination will be only used for good.
And, be encouraged! I'm here to tell you that it took ME three and a half years to graduate from Fort Worth Teen Challenge and, honey? It's a year-long program! haha! With me, though, they truly had their work cut out! In fact, they had to order more curriculum because I literally did ALL of the coursework in their classroom. For some of us, it takes more; it takes what it takes and there's no judgment in that. This all brings to my mind this little tidbit of truth directly from His Word, in fact:

That is to say that, if we're just making lateral comparisons of ourselves to the other flawed, imperfect human beings, we're doing it wrong. We are to compare ourselves to Jesus' standard, and we are supposed to compare our current selves to the self of the past, staying accountable to whether or not there is apparent growth, to ferret out where our next weakness is that we need to work on, et cetera. So, folks, if you're comparing yourself in a lateral sense to just other regular human beings, you're doing it wrong. It's fruitless and will do nothing but either fuel arrogant, conceited pride and make you feel (inaccurately) superior to others, or it will serve to make you feel "less than" - so, you see, there's no valid point to it, it's deep spiritual immaturity at best to have that kind of worldly, unfruitful mindset. Comparing ourselves to others is one of those "childish things" that God, in His word, admonishes us to "put away" in order to grow into genuine, actual maturity (and that has little to do with our physical, chronological age).

Anyway! I've got therapy tomorrow afternoon and always look forward to our sessions and am looking forward to sharing the little nuggets of insight that I've been given since our last session. And, since I found a stand for my phone at Dollar Tree, I can finally have those zoom calls in a hands-free manner, which should only enhance my ability to focus. 

Have a wonderful day, dear reader! Please remember to pray for this world that so desperately needs it, and thanks for stopping by. 💖

Happy Birthday, My Son! April 12th, 2026

Good morning, et cetera, dear Reader, and welcome! I woke up at 2 o'clock this morning and just decided to go ahead and stay up. 
I'm diving into the day's Proverb, here you go, if you need a compass for the morning. 

May my oldest son be blessed, today on his birthday, and always, as well as my youngest son. My only prayer is for them both to know Christ and Him crucified. Out of respect for my oldest who ask that I not openly talk about him here, that is all that I feel that I have the freedom to say. 💚

It's still about two hours before the Sun rises here; I hope that it's not cloudy at that time today! I can't wait for the two or three minute silent show of splendor that God bathes the world in during those Dawn moments, every day! When the creatures of the world wake up, all of them praise God in a chorus of barks and birdsong; it's glorious. I marvel at it now, wondering how I ever slept through such a miracle for so many years! Then again, like I said the other day, I am the exact and very same kind of person who'd hold an AA meeting inside of a bar, so, there's that.

Anyway, my therapist (he's amazing!) has been, in part, teaching me about the importance of mindfulness. Focused, counted breathing for one (which I do in the shower, when I remember to!) But, rather than that becoming a moment for self-focus, I realize this:

God Himself IS the breath of life! To be still and know that He is God shifts the focus from 'self' to Him! And this goes hand in hand with John 3:30 where John the Baptist declares "I must decrease that He may increase". I can see all of these things: my evil broken past, His redeeming power, His Word and His Will, all finally being woven together in my own life like a tapestry that exists solely for His will alone. 

Friend, if, like me, you have a shameful and evil past, take heart! There IS a Redeemer! He is mighty to save and there is no such thing as a human soul that He cannot reach, and further, redeem! 

The more sin and evil you've had in your past, in fact, the brighter His light may shine out from you, in stark contrast to what the world has to offer, that His Truth rise above all, that His salvation IS at hand, for all who will receive it.❤

P.S. I cheated and posted one last thing to my online account as something of a swan song; I'll tell my husband about it when he wakes up. the post includes the following short that lists the 8 products I use now for my daily go-to minimal makeup routine:

8 product face - 54 years old

Edited at 7:09 AM MST:
My husband awoke, so I told him of my 'swan song' final Fragrantica post and he's okay with it so YAY! I felt in my heart that it'd be okay, but it does have to be the single, final 'good-bye'. 👊

About "Doing the Thing" on April 11th, 2012

Good morning, world! Greetings and salutations and welcome (back?) to this hidden little section of cyberspace. My husband and I woke up within minutes of one another today and have been chatting over coffee for a good while so far; I've got my hair up in a ponytail due to the high winds anticipated today and left the door to the laundry room open so I can hear the dryer tumble.

Here is a link to today's Proverb (NIV translation again today).

On Monday, I'm making a cold-call to who I hope will become a trusted colleague and ally, a man who's been running his own homeless shelter since the mid 90's, not ironically the time that I spent in the ministry, being prepared for what is now finally at hand. Everything in my life has lead up to this point: my own periods of homelessness, which nothing could replace that first-hand experience that remains perpetually immeasurable in value. And, naysayers be damned, several AI programs are helping me really get this initiative nailed down, in step by logical step fashion. It's awesome, and, of course, now I know by way of a very bad experience that vetting the information provided by AI is required in order to ferret out that of value and shirk the rest. I am, at least, the kind of person who tries to learn from experience.

Now, about "the thing" I did which I alluded to in a previous post, now I'll go ahead and tell you: when Fragrantica's owner is home from his current travels, he will, himself, be deleting my nearly-fifteen year old account there. The staff that I've told there have all said they're sad to see me go, and frankly so am I, but I have to empty my hands of this in order to pick up that which has been divinely placed before me. Volunteering isn't something that I'll be doing part time, but is and will even moreso become the very substance of every day life, every moment, of every.single.day.

Here's a screenshot of the message that I sent detailing my request; I'll save the warm responses for my own personal reference.

100% of every single reason for my decision is lain out in that message, posted there above this line and there is nothing more or less to it than that. Retrospectively, of course, I can see where in several places I was harpooned by using the mousepad on this laptop; some of the relevant text was selected and deleted without my seeing it because I typed right on through it happening and didn't see that it did until after the fact. No matter, the gist of the content made it through, and that's what matters.

Now, since I have several days remaining before he's able to delete the account, I asked my spousal authority (my husband) if he thinks it'd be okay for me to just proceed as normal for these days; his advice is 'no, commit to it and do it now' so, starting today, that is what I'm doing, though I did log on to select my scent of the day today... and that's all. 

Here's my YouTube short about "doing it afraid" which I'm surprised to see has over 700 views (which, in the podcast world is nothing but, to my little regular-self, is significant). 

Do It Afraid!

I have to post it there as an embedded link... because I still haven't submitted a support request to blogger.com 😂

So! It's back to grant-writing I go, both for my 501(c)(3) - thank God that I've already got our EIN! - as well as a couple of other local charities.

It's far beyond time that I left the echo-chamber of self-aggrandizement for the true treasure of a life lived in service to the least of these (per Jesus' words in Matthew 25). 

The instant I made the decision, the Lord gave me this Scripture to back it up and confirm that yes, this is the right thing to do and yes, now IS the time:

There's nothing wrong with part-time volunteer work, and I encourage everyone to weave that into their lives when and wherever possible. But, in my case, He is demanding that it become my entire, waking, breathing life. So, it's truly no wonder that it's taken more than fifty years to prepare me for this holy assignment! 

And, know this: I intend to be boots on the ground, interfacing with the clients - washing their feet myself, rather than delegating the sacred tasks of service. I never want to become one of those "charity" CEO's raking in millions, sequestered away from those they claim to serve in expensive, fancy offices. No, I want to unlock the closet so the residents can shop, I want to let them pick out toiletries, I want to cook and then hand them food, I want to make their beds, wash their clothing, pray for them, and sometimes even literally wash their feet. 
What a deep and profound honor it will be and, folks? 
I can't wait! 

❤

A Beautiful Day in April, 2026

Good morning, et cetera, dear Reader, and welcome to this obscure little blip in the virtual ocean! I first woke up at about three a.m. this morning as usual, but was able to go back to sleep for more than another three hours; when I woke up, it was near sunrise, but it's cloudy today, at least it is so far this morning, so I didn't miss anything (meaning, those three approximate minutes when Heaven leaks down to earth and bathes the world and sky in colors and light so beautiful as to take one's breath away). 

Addiction, it's a real thing; at least, for many of us it is. And we (that is, humans/ people) are the kind of folk who'll hold AA meetings inside of a bar. I don't say that to be mean, just "look at us"(all!) right? Friend, I'm in that boat, too. There are plenty of realities that I'm blind too, mistake, or just plain ignore; I, too, am human. Please know that when I start to sound real preachy (as I write, here) it's only because I am preaching these things first and foremost to myself, and, if anyone else finds value in anything shared, that's wonderful! If not, well, maybe at least you can get a good laugh. It's important that you know, though, dear Reader, where my heart is in all of this.

My oldest son, estranged with good reason because I was an awful, terrible mother (just keeping it real, you can ask both of the boys, and they'll tell you) anyway, he's managed to make it so far in life, in spite of me and the other imperfect conditions of his childhood. His birthday is in two days and, though I don't deserve a relationship with him, love him today and will with every remaining breath. In fact, I've tried to make a deal with God, and asked Him to please see to it that both of my sons get to know Him and Him crucified, even if that means that I never see or hear from either one of them again. That's because God is everything, and if I get to choose between having them in my own life and them having God in theirs, well, the choice is crystal clear and there IS no room for debate. So, may he have a wonderful birthday coming up in a couple of days; may he be doing well, I pray for it every day. 

We can't undo the past, y'all. It's impossible. But! We *can* learn from our mistakes and do better going forward. That's the best that any of us can really do, so don't look back in despair; look back in honesty and reflection, yes, but try to learn whatever lesson there is to be had in your past mistakes and move forward, in gratitude and humility, and try to apply what you've learned to life going forward. If you're doing that, or trying to, I personally can see zero fault in you, none at all, because that means that your heart is in the right place. Anyway, who am I to judge? No one. 

Now, we are supposed to have discernment - that is "be wise as serpents and innocent as doves" - but part of discernment is being able to separate the sin from the sinner. Yes, condemn all acts of evil; concurrently, love the person doing those acts and pray for them; walk in love as best you can; it's what I'm trying to do and fail at constantly, but I will never stop trying, because "a righteous man falls and will arise seven times, but the wicked are brought down by calamity" (that's somewhere in Proverbs, paraphrased). This is wonderful news for you and for me, because that means that failure is ONLY fatal if we fail to keep trying again, no matter how many times it takes or how long that turns out to be.

Try again. Try harder.

This is a first/rough draft, thoughts typed out as I think them, so, please forgive the 'rough-cut' in the way that I write, and thank you for that.

Here is a link to today's Proverb, this time in the NIV version.

I Made a Choice and did the Thing on April 9th, 2026

Greetings and salutations, dear Reader, on a mild April evening, where I sit and type thoughts, my own which are safe to discuss. 

I may not disclose what "the thing" is exactly, not just yet. But it was huge. Huge and, I feel will turn out to be, pivotal as well. This is the game changer; this is where the rest of this earthly life takes off, in a whole 'nother direction! I'm concurrently at peace while tempted to allow Fear some room as well, but there is none. All courage really is is "doing it afraid" anyway. 

Give Me Your Eyes

💖

Banned in the USA on April 6th, 2026

Good morning, et cetera, dear Reader, and welcome to this obscure little blip in cyberspace. Welcome back if you've been here before; it's super early here in the MST, not yet four a.m. as I sit to start this chain of thoughts, drinking coffee. God is good (all the time!)

(insert "Lord, You Are Good" by Israel Houghton video here)😂
yeah, my blogger on this laptop still doesn't work right. 

Normally I read the day's Proverb, but for a few days early in the month including today, those Proverbs are all about infidelity/ sexual immorality. And, yes, that wisdom is good to learn and rehash! Only, I learned that lesson first hand in my twenties; in the intervening years, that kind of behavior has become truly morally repugnant to me so, in that one regard, I feel like I'm good, you know? 
The first 22 verses of today's Proverb are very good, full of more general wisdom, so there you have it. 

Well, praise God, I got banned on the perfume website again - get this, for posting religious content (on Easter aka Resurrection Sunday) and I bought some clothing, these things:

and

Um... they're clothes; I'm American. Tell me which political party this allegedly supports, because, to my mind, "America" means ALL Americans, irrespective of political affiliation, but, hey, that's just me. It's the nation's 250th anniversary this year, so I bought a shirt in commemoration, and a hat that I'll share with my husband (but look forward to throwing it on over a ponytail myself, too). 

And, of course I can't post it here due to the technical issues I'm having here (Yes, I should submit a support request, but I digress) there was also the YouTube video of a man reading the entire US Constitution aloud that I shared; again, our founding documents are relative to ALL Americans, not just Democrats, not just Republicans or Independents - but ALL Americans; it's historically relevant and educational. Again, political how exactly? Sheesh, y'all, the snowflakes are running this world into the ground. These are the same people who want to charge you with hate crimes for using the wrong pronouns, but celebrate murdering the unborn by ripping them limb from limb in the womb.

Please, guys, somebody make it make sense?

I didn't even get mildly irritated, let alone mad or worse when I read the admin's message about it, but brought up those observations that I just detailed here; I'm interested to see what, if any, the response will be? It's their call though; it's all good. 

I wore a favorite, pretty white dress yesterday, so today, I'm in a favorite old, oversized shirt (pale mint green with a lovely white dove decoration on the front) with some ankle-length, black cotton-blend leggings, barefoot but I'll grab my plain black leather ballet flats to leave the house, much, much later, once we've got daylight. It's all about a ponytail today, too, but I've dressed this very casual look up by wearing this new set that my husband gave me this past Valentine's Day:

Don't you just love the silent morning hours, before the rest of the surrounding world wakes up? This is the best part of the day, when I can truly not only hear myself think but, more importantly, it gives room for the quiet whisper of the Holy Spirit to speak His mind to me, which I'm always in need of and greedy to hear every day, yes, even correction and rebuke! Hey, let's be real, I always have it coming (human = imperfect). But it's just like His Word says, that He corrects the child that He loves, as we do our own children. I'd rather hear His correction and rebuke rather than not hear from Him at all, that would be the worst fate in the Universe.
Damn but that's a scary thought! So yes, dear Lord, please never, ever stop correcting me and thank You! (in Jesus' Name, amen).

Now, to be funny, I'd normally post the video "Banned in the USA" by 2 Live Crew from way back in the day right here, but the technical issues I'm having... yes, yes, yes, I'll submit a support request soon! Jeez.
 
Fortunately I can get all political and religious here, though; if it offends you, feel free to leave if you like, that's all you. I'm good with it either way, really. If you happen to find some value in anything that I choose to share, that's great, and I hope that you do! It's not about ME anyway; it's literally all about the message, like in John 3:30 where John says "I must decrease that He may increase" - it's literally exactly that. My identity is in Him; the more of 'me' that melts into Him, the better! I apologize that I can't articulate that concept in a way that any unbeliever would be able to comprehend, but that's part of the nature of (real, genuine) faith and the mysteries of God; the great, wonderful news is that He can make it make sense and often does, if we diligently seek after the rewards of wisdom and understanding. "Seek" is indicative of far, far more than a casual, passing interest. Ladies, imagine you've lost a diamond earring; you know the way you'll grab a flashlight and move every piece of furniture in the house to try and find that lost earring? That, dear friend, is what it means to "seek" - it's the kind of attitude that He wants us to develop toward Him and His Word, the things of God in general. "Seek" - it's not a casual word, was put there on purpose, and it means what it means. If you're just sending up a wishlist to God and becoming an atheist when He doesn't meet your demands and those on your time table, you're doing it wrong, man. Try again. Try harder. 

Look at the AI breakdown of the verse that speaks to this very thing, from the book of Isaiah:

I legit hope that this will give you hope in God, knowing that you merely have to pursue Him passionately, trusting Him with your heart (the part of you that transcends and is far, far deeper than mere intellect). 

Anyway, I'll go make more coffee now. Sorry that I can't post videos here, but I'm sure you've all got your own YouTube or whatever thing going on. 

Thanks for stopping by and please have a great day as you seek the Lord and His will for you. He loves you so, so very much!💖